Shifting Energy

I need a snack and a nap. I'm at work until 5:30pm. It's 90+ degrees outside. I'm supposed to do a 5k run today. All I want to do is go home, eat a treat, and fall asleep with the fan blowing on me. Mmmmm.. sounds so nice.

Last night we celebrated the end of our first session of Ninja Boot Camp by inviting all of the participants and their SFs over for some food and a Kung-Fu movie. Lewis, Matt, and Bonnie were the only people who came, but we had quite a wonderful time with them. I love having people over. All of the thought and preparation that I put into making it a comfortable evening for everyone brings me joy. I made some delicious gluten-free brownies from Elana's Pantry and they were devoured. I love it when I bake something without flour, sugar, or dairy and people can't believe how good it is; that it's better than the "real thing".

After our lovely evening with friends and good food, I just had to go ahead and have a "freak out" (as Ramman likes to put it). Usually when I freak out it's related to money. I hate that. When I am stressed about money I have this constant pit-in-my-stomach feeling until I feel more in control of my financial destiny. But the thing is, I still have yet to REALLY be in control. And then there's the question how much control one should be trying to gain over whatever situation is causing distress. At what point does trying to gain control become completely detrimental to the very aspect of your life that you are trying so hard to control? This is what I feel is happening with me and money. And it's been happening my entire life. Was I born into this financial karma? Can I escape it? Ramman thinks there is some deeply rooted issue with my perspective on not only how to acquire money, but also the thought (and emotion!) that none of my dreams or goals can be accomplished without a great amount of it. In my mind one has to work work work and save save save to make things happen. To go on the adventure, to start the gym, to be comfortable... But the thing is, IT DOESN'T HAVE TO WORK THAT WAY.

Last winter we both read a book called "The Four-Hour Workweek" by Timothy Ferriss. Here is a guy, in his early thirties, who GETS IT. He has mastered the game of life by first recognizing that he didn't have to buy into to the norms, and then refusing to play in it. He teaches people about how create an automated income so that you can dramatically decrease the hours per week you work, while dramatically increasing the amount of money you make. This liberation allows you to experience life the way it should be experienced- all over the world, learning languages and unique hobbies and helping people in whatever way you want to. He is THE example of what people should be doing with their lives. Read it. I'm reading it again. And I will read it again until I GET IT.